Unknown Author Quotations

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A person doesn't know how much he has to be thankful for until he has to pay taxes on it.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Taxes]

Did you ever notice that when you put the words "The" and "IRS" together, it spells "THEIRS?"
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Taxes]

People who complain about taxes can be divided into two classes: men and women.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Taxes]

Taxes: Of life's two certainties, the only one for which you can get an automatic extension.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Taxes]

The best things in life are free, but sooner or later the government will find a way to tax them.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Taxes]

A fool-proof method for sculpting an elephant: first, get a huge block of marble; then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Imagination]

Don't expect anything original from an echo.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Imagination]

Philosophy is nothing but common sense in a dress suit.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Philosophy]

Religion is a man using a divining rod. Philosophy is a man using a pick and shovel.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Philosophy]

The only difference between graffiti and philosophy is the word "fuck."
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Philosophy]

A racehorse is an animal that can take several thousand people for a ride at the same time.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Gambling]

Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Gambling]

Games of chance are traps to catch school boy novies and gaping country squires, who begin with a guinea and end with a mortgage.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Gambling]

In a bet there is a fool and a thief.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Gambling]

In the case of an earthquake hitting Las Vegas, be sure to go straight to the Keno Lounge. Nothing ever gets hit there.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Gambling]

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Gambling]

There is but one good throw upon the dice, which is, to throw them away.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Gambling]

A three-year-old gave this reaction to her Christmas dinner: "I don't like the turkey, but I like the bread he ate."
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Food]

Chemicals, n: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made.
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Food]

Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
	- Unknown Author	more quotations on [Food]

Viewing quotes 542 to 561 (912 total)	[page 1] [page 2] [page 3] [page 4] [page 5]
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