| A person doesn't know how much he has to be thankful for until he has to pay taxes on it. |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Taxes] |
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| Did you ever notice that when you put the words "The" and "IRS" together, it spells "THEIRS?" |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Taxes] |
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| People who complain about taxes can be divided into two classes: men and women. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| Taxes: Of life's two certainties, the only one for which you can get an automatic extension. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| The best things in life are free, but sooner or later the government will find a way to tax them. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| A fool-proof method for sculpting an elephant: first, get a huge block of marble; then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant. |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Imagination] |
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| Don't expect anything original from an echo. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| Philosophy is nothing but common sense in a dress suit. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| Religion is a man using a divining rod. Philosophy is a man using a pick and shovel. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| The only difference between graffiti and philosophy is the word "fuck." |
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- Unknown Author |
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| A racehorse is an animal that can take several thousand people for a ride at the same time. |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Gambling] |
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| Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| Games of chance are traps to catch school boy novies and gaping country squires, who begin with a guinea and end with a mortgage. |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Gambling] |
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| In a bet there is a fool and a thief. |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Gambling] |
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| In the case of an earthquake hitting Las Vegas, be sure to go straight to the Keno Lounge. Nothing ever gets hit there. |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Gambling] |
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| Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| There is but one good throw upon the dice, which is, to throw them away. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| A three-year-old gave this reaction to her Christmas dinner: "I don't like the turkey, but I like the bread he ate." |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Food] |
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| Chemicals, n: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made. |
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- Unknown Author |
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| Do vegetarians eat animal crackers? |
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- Unknown Author |
more quotations on [Food] |
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